Tag Archive: imao


8 Things You Can Do to Pick Up the Slack of Sequestered Government

 

 

” So we’re a couple days into the sequester; how is everyone holding out? You may seem fine now, but let’s not underestimate the devastating effects of having marginally smaller government. In fact, to keep order in this country, maybe we can all pick up some of the slack of our 2% smaller government.”

 

THINGS YOU CAN DO TO HELP REPLACE GOVERNMENT

* If anyone needs something from you, make him wait in a line.

Visit IMAO for the other seven recommendations and be sure to check out the additional suggestions in the comments section .

Frank J On Obama’s Competency Gap

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” This idea that President Obama should only
appoint honest, competent people is really
unfair. The guy is a Chicago politician; he’s
probably never once met anyone like that.
Just look at his first Cabinet to see how out-
of-the-blue this demand for competency is.
He has a treasury secretary who couldn’t
figure out how to pay his own taxes. His
attorney general leads a Justice Department
that somehow thought selling guns to
Mexican drug cartels would have good
results. “

Play along over at IMAO … Venture your opinion as too what the moniker of the secession states should be .

The New Country Will Be Called…

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Works like this: I feed you Moon
Nukers a straight line, and you hit me with a punch line in the comments 30 50 states have submitted petitions to secede. The new country will be called…

Read the comments and offer your own … Great fun to be had with Harvey and Frank J.

What Are You Avenging on Election
Day?

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Posed by Frank J

” My favorite office toy has been
discontinued. Obama’s government
destroyed them because stupid kids
kept swallowing those magnets, even though there is a warning right on the box that says, “Don’t let your stupid kid swallow these!” ”

Hurricane Survival Tips

From IMAO , to be taken lightly

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” There’s a big hurricane heading towards the east coast. I don’t live there anymore, so I don’t care that much. Still I’ve lived through a few hurricanes myself and know quite a bit about them. A long while ago I wrote some Fun Facts on hurricanes , and here some more tips for surviving a hurricane:

HURRICANE SURVIVAL TIPS

* You can’t let a hurricane know you’re scared of it as they can smell fear and will attack it. The safest place to be when a hurricane comes is out front of your house on the lawn shaking your fist at it.

+ Make sure to have a hurricane survival kit well stocked with water, beef jerky, Pixy Stix, a chinchilla, various lengths of lead pipe, The Rock on DVD, a hairnet, bear mace, a jaunty hat, and a box labeled “Hurricane Survival Kit” that’s actually filled with snakes. ”

Posted by John Galt

Frank J at IMAO

” The Middle East is in chaos,
Americans are murdered, and the
economy continues to crumble, and
Obama is going on The View after his
fun time with Letterman. You ever
get this feeling that the problems
facing America just aren’t that
interesting to Obama? I felt that way
early on when everyone was
complaining about unemployment
and Obama responded by… working
on a big new health care scheme. “

“Have you no shame, Mr. Romney?”

” How dare you point out the
incompetence and failed leadership of former foreign aid student Barack Obama? “

New “Dirty” Harry Reid revelations from IMAO .

“However, Harry Reid’s done something IMAO has yet to do: get a definition in the Urban Dictionary.”

“Congratulations, Harry.

You filthy pederast.

Or so I’ve heard on the internet. ”

  Actually it is his third definition , read on …. just make sure your mouth is empty . Be sure and check out the links at IMAO for the complete hysteria…

” UPDATE: This is actually Harry’s third definition at UD. The first is “A sexual position where you climb on top and then do absolutely nothing.”
    The second is adult, explicit, and I can’t even describe it on this PG-13 blog, so be careful if you click that link above, lest your eyeballs catch on fire and fly out of your skull because you scrolled down too far. “

8 Pieces of Advice from Obama’s Jobs Council

“We were going to talk to someone who has created a business before, but none of us know anyone like that.”

   In consideration of his 10 year Blogiversary Frank J at IMAO has compiled a post linking to some of his personal favorites of his first decade .

    Laughs galore as you would imagine and below we are pleased to provide a direct link to one of our personal favorites here at YouViewed .

     That’s right , LOL , those filthy lies about Glenn Reynolds

Enjoy them all . We sure have .

   ” So there is the filthy lie: Glenn Reynolds puts puppies in blenders. Start spreading it to everyone. Tell your parents, tell your siblings, tell your uncle in Clevland, and send an e-mail to your congressman. And, when they exclaim, “Glenn Reynolds puts puppies in blenders! I’ll never go to his site again!” You tell them, “Then go to IMAO.us. Frank J. is at the forefront in the fight against putting puppies in blenders.” “

IMAO

WASHINGTON (AP) –

  ” House Democrat Leader Nancy Pelosi credited the Supreme Court’s upholding of Obamacare’s individual mandate to the late Democrat Senator Ted Kennedy’s
angelic intervention, saying , “I knew that when he left us he would go to heaven and help pass the bill.” Pelosi then encouraged people to “use whatever wacky religious beliefs they had” to help get President Obama reelected.”

  A little humor is in order after this tumultuous day with Harvey and IMAO just the folks to provide it .

  “10 Reasons Why Jimmy Carter Was More Kick-Ass Than President Obama

   Full disclosure: I had a paper route during the Carter years, and when I got bored, I read the headlines. So I remember Jimmy’s term in office better than most people my age, because those
headlines were bleak and terrifying,
and left scars. “

Harvey at IMAO does it again

  “President Obama is now claiming he doesn’t have to turn over Fast & Furious-related documents to Congress, citing “executive privilege” – sort of a presidential “get out of jail free” card that lets him do anything he wants.

I guess protecting your porch-snoozing watchdog of an Attorney General from the lengthy jail sentence he so richly deserves is a good reason to use it.

But why stop there?

Here’s some other situations he might be able to escape using Executive Privilege “

Votes … Get yer Votes Here

   Big Hairy News and the latest on the Obama vote buying pander .

 “WASHINGTON (BHN) – President Obama announced today that he has instructed the Department of Homeland Security to cease deporting illegal immigrants whosnuck into entered this country at a young age.”

Time Illegal Aliens

 

And as a companion piece check out this video via IMAO 

I Pledge Allegiance …

   Thanks to the folks at IMAO for reminding us that today is Flag Day and also for pointing out how much that means to our “Dear Leader” .

    

 

   From the folks at IMAO , suggested TV appearances for Obama .  

 

”  During the typical softball slugfest that the media oft attempts to pass off an interview these days, tuckus-snuffling reporter Tom Wills of WJXT in Jacksonville lobbed this one at Obama:

“Mr. President, we’ve heard you sing, we’ve seen you do stand up at the correspondents dinner.” Tom Wills of WJXT in Jacksonville, Fla. stated.

“I was just wondering if you would give any thought to being on ‘American Idol’ or ‘America’s Got Talent’?” he asked. “You’d be a big hit Mr. President.”

Well, if we’re going that direction, here are some shows that Mr. President might be better suited for: ” 

1) Pretty Little Liars

 

You’ll have to go there to read the others . Have a laugh .

Fun Facts of the 57 States

  Today Harvey over at IMAO treats to fun facts about California . Part of their ongoing series regarding our “57” varieties , er , states .

 

” * California used to be covered by thick forests of giant redwood trees, but these have all been cut down to make nightsticks for beating black motorists.

* The state motto of California is “Eureka!”, a Greek word meaning “Dude!”

* More turkeys are raised in California than in any other state, and most of them get released from Hollywood during the summer.

* The Hollywood Bowl is the world’s largest outdoor amphitheater. Just to clarify a common misconception, no special shoes are required. You’re thinking of the Hollywood Bowl-o-Ram “

Obama’s 99%, Sarah and Anna

The tone deafness is monumental . 

IMAO on the hypocrisy inherent in people like Sarah Jessica Parker and Anna Wintour regaling the 99% on behalf of Obama .  

 “Yeah, nothing says “the common touch” like a Hollywood millionaire bragging about throwing a swanky party.”

 

You see , the celubutards ARE Obama’s 99% 

   As usual Frank J Fleming hits the mark :

“Imagine you are at a fast food restaurant. You have selected your sandwich and your side order
of fries, and you realize that this meal will make you thirsty. You will need — nay, you will require — a beverage to wash it down.
So you.say to the woman at the register, “I would like a soda.”
And she looks at you with her dead eyes, her soul withered away by years of menial work in
the service industry, and she utters the immortal question, “Small,medium, or large?” “

Huh ?

  “President Obama’s eco-friendly EPA inked a green partnership deal with high-octane NASCAR Monday to promote recycling and environmentally-friendly products to the sport’s millions of fans.

According to the Environmental Protection Agency, NASCAR will encourage fans to buy “sustainable concessions” at races, expand the use of “safer chemical products,” conserve water, reduce waste, promote recycling, push products approved by the EPA that have a small enviro footprint and encourage suppliers to get an “E3 tuneup” aimed at promoting sustainable manufacturing.Missing: any talk of greening races or race cars that consume about 450,000 gallons of gas a year and average five miles per gallon. ”

HT/IMAO

Enjoy IMAO‘s : 10 Things Nancy Pelosi knows better than you .

“The West Coast Botoxian is at it again, bragging about how much smarter she is than the numerous federal judges and countless legal scholars who disagree with her:

“When asked why she is so confident the Supreme Court will uphold the health care law, Pelosi says, “Because I know the Constitution.” ”

“7) Nancy knows how to turn lead into gold. Step 1: find someone with gold. Step 2: hit them with a lead pipe and steal it.”

Some humor from IMAO , on the mark , as usual .

“1) Government union workers construct the lemonade stand. Construction takes three years, and comes in at just over 2 million dollars… more than twice the projected amount.

2) Obama is not part of the union, so he can’t work in his own stand. AFL-CIO goons picket the stand before it opens and threaten people in the neighborhood ”

Be sure and read the rest . Start your day with a laugh .

 “I look at these pictures and feel an almost spiritual sense of awe and wonder to think that men could build such things, and – despite the obvious and incredible amounts of cash sunk into this sprawling landscape of engineering wonders – still run the operation at a profit.”

Thanks , Harvey 

  From , of all places IMAO , We are treated to a very extensive photo essay in Business Insider that gives one a true idea of what is involved in the mining of oil sands . Lots of pictures and lots of information . There is also a link at the end to a companion photo essay regarding the newer technology of hydrofracking . If you have ever wondered what goes into the production of petroleum products this post is required reading . Well worth your time .

Here is just one of the spectacular collection of photos that comprise this article . Be sure and check out the rest . 

 

 “The Cat 797 dump trucks are the largest in the world and and can haul 1 million pounds in a single load — more weight than a fully loaded Boeing 747”

The Cat 797 dump trucks are the largest in the world and and can haul 1 million pounds in a single load — more weight than a fully loaded Boeing 747

Once again Mr. Fleming delivers a laugh to keep the tears from flowing .

” Let’s face it: We’re never going to deal with the serious problems in our county. The economy is
still faltering, our debt seems insurmountable,gas prices are out of control and terrorists are
still trying to blow us up with their underwear.
But what issue is dominating the presidential race right now? Gay marriage. ”

There certainly is an attention deficit in this country . But also a courage deficit ….

” We can’t even leave it to the politicians to solve our problems, because they’re not any better.
When President Obama took office, he saw the joblessness and faltering economy and decided
he didn’t feel like dealing with that — instead, he started playing with his fun new health-care plan. ”

As Frank says , we won’t deal with the issues until they bite us on the ..s .

” Maybe we’ll just have to put Ritalin in the water to help us all focus. Because otherwise the only time our economy and the national debt will be interesting enough to hold our attention is when the country has collapsed. That will really grab everyone’s interest — you’ve seen how popular all those zombie-apocalypse shows and movies are. ”

Stock up on ammo and machetes its Zombietime .